More tranny stories later!
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
