I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize
