I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
