its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
