Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
