Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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