Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
