I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I lost the right to judge tonight
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize