haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
