Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
