she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
