she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize