I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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