she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
