I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
