I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
