Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
