K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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