Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
