I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize