Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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