I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize