you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Randomize
