i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize