Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
