You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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