I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
