seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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