Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
