she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
So much rum. So many feels.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
