so explain again why im purple
no
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize