Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Randomize
