alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
