You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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