Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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