I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
