Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
