So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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