Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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