she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
