you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
