Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
