Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
