went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
