How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Randomize
