You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize