in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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