only if we run a train.
done.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
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