He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
