dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
