Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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